We Need to Talk About ‘Indian Matchmaking’

It might seem strange to invoke an Alice Walker essay in connection with the new Netflix reality series, Indian Matchmaking , but, here we go. The essay is revolutionary for that coinage. Walker explicitly draws a connection between skin color and marriage. Walker tells us two smaller, adjoining stories, about herself and a friend in their single days. In the Netflix series Indian Matchmaking , the importance of skin color arrives quickly in talk of matrimony, as do other facets of packaged appearance, the sorts that indicate a notion of a stratified universe: This level of education matches with this one, this shade of skin with this, this height with this, these family values with these, this caste with this, this region with this, and so on. In the series, she takes on clients in India and America, young desi men and women who seem, for all their desire to get properly paired off, equally conflicted about the whole endeavor.

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Follow Us. The controversial Netflix show has reignited debate over traditional marriage matches, but without interrogating harmful stereotypes, says Meehika Barua. One evening in late November when I was heading for a meeting in Holborn, my Indian friend, who is 25, texted me to say that she was getting married. Trains went by as I stood at London Bridge station, typing furiously, glaring at my phone. The arranged marriage had been fixed up by her parents.

Shruti Rajagopalan joins Juliet Litman to break down the Netflix show ‘Indian Matchmaking‘.

By Sajmun Sachdev August 11, But while I was celebrating what I found to be a super authentic look into the world of matchmaking, arranged marriages and Indian family dynamics, many reviewers and tweeters made me realize that I may be the only South Asian woman who was. So seeing that representation in Indian Matchmaking made me feel proud: Finally an Indian filmmaker had accomplished what we got into this industry to do: She put us on TV.

Indian Matchmaking could never be everything to everybody and still be the success it is. She is, simply, a stereotypical aunty. A divorced woman is a failure. Like the criticisms of Taparia, several people online were unhappy with the traits the participants prioritized when looking for their partners. For example, Ankita is dark-skinned; coupled with the fact she has modern viewpoints, she therefore only receives one match.

Skin lightening creams are a billion-dollar business in India, Asia and Africa. Critics, and even some of my friends, found them to be stereotypical and ugh-inducing Indian parents, their worst qualities reminding people of their own fathers and mothers. But I found their familiarity exciting, because I knew these people. I was either related to them or grew up running into them at the temple.

Instead of being embarrassed, we South Asians should commend these parents for going on TV and giving us authentic representation by fully being themselves; especially considering most Indian parents I know would be too concerned about how other people would perceive them to go on TV in the first place.

Chicagoan Shekar Jayaraman talks about his experience on new Netflix show ‘Indian Matchmaking’

I can give her…95 marks out of It is reflective, sometimes painfully, of a custom with which we are all too familiar: arranged marriages. For desis, either your parents were arranged or you know a couple that was.

“Indian Matchmaking” is an eight-episode series on Netflix capturing the experiences of wealthy Indian-Americans and Indians as they navigate.

What influences our youth to set aside their enterprising, free-wheeling spirit to follow the well-trodden path of arranged marriages? Part of the answer lies in the deep socialisation process, which is woven into the fabric of the close-knit extended Indian family, and its rootedness in the larger network of society. The young too seem to believe in the cultural definition of marriage as a family affair, rather than an individual undertaking.

Harmony and shared values arising from common backgrounds are seen as more important than individual attraction. The common grounds provided by an arranged match — familiar customs, foods, relatives, incomes, etc — also helps in negotiating the dark thicket of matchmaking. The upside is also that this aids the adjustment process with the new partner and family, a stand-in for what is seen as the variable element of love.

When it comes to daughters, the disciplining fetters become even tighter, since a tarnished reputation would scupper her chances in the marriage market. With whom?

Review: ‘Indian Matchmaking’ flaws don’t outweigh much-needed representation

The second I saw Netflix’s Indian Matchmaking come up on my TV’s home screen, I excitedly texted a bunch of my Desi friends to see if they’d heard anything about it. I’m not saying that there weren’t any stereotypes that caught me off guard on the show like some of the character’s fake accents or the opening scene where Devi’s praying over a book for good grades , but there were some moments that really hit home for me in the coming-of-age comedy.

While I was excited to see something related to the Indian culture get the spotlight yet again, it sort of felt like a personal secret was about to be exposed to the world. I was a little worried how Indians would be portrayed, especially to people who aren’t familiar with a culture where arranged marriages are considered the norm.

Indian Matchmaking. TV 1 SeasonReality TV. Matchmaker Sima Taparia guides clients in the U.S. and India in the arranged marriage.

Sima Taparia is like a human Hinge algorithm. Card system, except instead of dueling, the players must get drinks with one another. Like all good bad reality dating shows such as recent Netflix hits Love Is Blind and Too Hot To Handle , the dates are largely cringey to watch, and there is ghosting, awkwardness, and family drama.

Oh my! But the show has been met with equal parts fascination and criticism. While Indian Matchmaking carefully and successfully swats away stigmas that surround the concept of arranged marriage—that marriages are forced, or that individuals lack the freedom to make their own decisions— critics have highlighted that the show reinforces heteronormativity, divisions between social classes, and discrimination based on skin color, ethnicity, and status. And while the series mostly opts to steer clear of those conversations, our concern for the mostly likable, relatable cast on their search for love runs deep.

Times and OprahMag. Out now for the world to see! IndianMatchmaking is now streaming on netflix and what an absolute surreal feeling! Thank you to smritimundhra hoodle ferial83 and the rest of the team for being sooo great and making it easy for me to share my story and my family. Extra special thank you to simataparia for guiding me through this whole process. The story was told in such a genuine way and I loved how real everything was.

Netflix’s “Indian Matchmaking” Tells Women to Compromise. I Refused to Do That.

It turns out the outspoken, and “stubborn,” breakout star of Netflix’s controversial new reality dating show ‘Indian Matchmaking‘ is a romantic after all. She spoke with us recently by phone about dating and relationships. The hit show itself is about a matchmaker named Sima who helps arrange a marriage—a traditional form of courtship and matrimony in India—for clients all over the world.

On Netflix’s “Indian Matchmaking,” marriage consultant Sima Taparia travels the world to meet with hopeful clients and help them find the.

Jump to navigation. Our intelligent matchmaking system means we surpass other Indian dating sites by helping you pick out the very best potential partners for you. First, we use our personality test — which every new member takes — to determine how open, conscientious, extraverted, agreeable and neurotic you are, and match you with potential partners accordingly. Secondly, we take factors like your level of education, income and location into account.

Lastly, we take a look at your preferences and try to send you matches closest to your ideal idea of a partner. For most singles in the US, dating has only gotten harder; careers have taken over, and meeting new people outside of your friendship circle seems near impossible. Many of our members are busy professionals , devoted to their careers but looking for long-lasting love and a meaningful relationship all the same. Want to see more? Search our member database using our handy ‘Have you met The market leader for successful singles, EliteSingles is the place to meet eligible Indian singles.

Upscale Matchmaking for Indian Singles

Sushmita Pathak. Is it a match? A potential couple meet up courtesy of a matchmaker in the Netflix series Indian Matchmaking. Netflix hide caption. A picky year-old from Mumbai whose unwillingness to marry raises his mom’s blood pressure.

If you’ve been on Netflix lately, you may have seen “Indian Matchmaking.” We talked to one of the women featured in the show, Rashi Gupta.

The Netflix hit “Indian Matchmaking” has stirred up conversations about issues like parental preference in marriage, cultural progress, casteism — and ghosting. Taparia answered questions via email from Mumbai, discussing why none of the matches worked out, her own arranged marriage and how business is booming despite the coronavirus pandemic. Sima Taparia: They are not separate things. Matchmaking is just a tool to help people find a life partner.

In India, the process also often involves parents. Has the show generated new interest in matchmaking with more people wanting to do it? Business is booming! With or without pandemic, people are still searching for life partners and I’m working hard for my clients. Weddings may be delayed, but matchmaking is as busy as ever.

Since childhood I was fond of socializing and meeting new people. I had an unique ability to remember faces and names, so I always knew which families had a son or daughter who was of marriageable age. I was doing matchmaking as a hobby, then my family suggested to me to do this as a profession.

Single to Shaadi offers curated matches for South Asian Singles

Skip to Content. People are matched in hopes of finding suitable marriage partner; marriage is marker of success in matchmaking process. Much of the advice given to women when trying to find compatible matches can be considered sexist; preferences for other attributes can be interpreted as racist or classist both within Western and Indian circles. Clients range from being inflexible in their criteria to being unwilling to commit. Parents often state that all they want is happiness for their son or daughter, but then reveal very specific criteria for their future son- or daughter-in-law.

Early in Indian Matchmaking, Netflix’s haute-reality TV show about the arranging of arranged marriages, one of the subjects explains why she.

We use cookies and other tracking technologies to improve your browsing experience on our site, show personalized content and targeted ads, analyze site traffic, and understand where our audiences come from. To learn more or opt-out, read our Cookie Policy. Taparia travels across India and the U. Indian Matchmaking has been controversial in the Indian community, both among people in India, and among the diaspora.

But my wife and I were both put off something different: the lack of socioeconomic diversity on display. Indian Matchmaking is available to stream on Netflix.

Sima Taparia of ‘Indian Matchmaking’ on family dynamics, ghosting and failed matches

On Netflix’s “Indian Matchmaking,” marriage consultant Sima Taparia travels the world to meet with hopeful clients and help them find the perfect match for an arranged marriage. The format of the show is simple. Hopeful brides- and grooms-to-be meet with Taparia — often with their overbearing parents in tow — for an initial consultation. Criteria are laid out, potential suitors are presented on paper, dates are arranged, and then it’s up to the couple to decide if it’s a match.

In some respects, the producers should be commended.

The Netflix reality series Indian Matchmaking has been a viral hit, but mostly because people are talking about the controversies around it.

Look no further! No worries. The Marriage Game by Sara Desai. Traditional in their ways, they believe in arranged marriages. Layla goes out on the dates her father arranged. If she accepts one of the suitors, she gets engaged and Sam gets the office. If Layla rejects all of the men, she gets the office. Nothing could possibly go wrong with that plan, right?

Fun descriptions of Bollywood movies and delicious descriptions of Indian food. Liya Thakkar is a successful biochemical engineer, takeout enthusiast, and happily single woman. Imagine her surprise when the same guy shows up at her office a week later — the new lawyer hired to save her struggling company. Jay Shah looks good on paper…and off. Especially if you like that whole gorgeous, charming lawyer-in-a-good-suit thing. As their witty office banter turns into late-night chats, Liya starts to think he might be the one man who truly accepts her.

Cal grad shares experience on Netflix’s reality show ‘Indian Matchmaking’

The Mumbai-based matchmaker Sima Taparia delivers this meme-friendly one-liner in the seventh episode of the hit Netflix series Indian Matchmaking. But she departs from this well-worn model in her attention to one extra characteristic: caste. This silent shadow hangs over every luxurious living room she leads viewers into. She lumps an entire social system, which assigns people to a fixed place in a hierarchy from birth, together with anodyne physical preferences.

The second I saw Netflix’s Indian Matchmaking come up on my TV’s home screen​, I excitedly texted a bunch of my Desi friends to see if they’d.

CNN Smriti Mundhra is not at all bothered that people are talking about colorism, sexism and elitism when it comes to “Indian Matchmaking. Chat with us in Facebook Messenger. Find out what’s happening in the world as it unfolds. More Videos Why the Netflix show ‘Indian Matchmaking‘ is causing a stir She is the creator of the hit Netflix series that offers an inside look into the work of Sima Taparia, a Mumbai-based matchmaker who travels the world helping her client find their “life partners.

After the series recent debut social media was filled with complaints about everything from the privileged lifestyles of some of the participants to the desire that was expressed by some to be matched with “fair” potential spouses. I would never want to make a show that sanitizes that because I think we need to have those conversations and we need to push to do better as a community and as a culture. Read More. Mundhra is well versed in the issues being raised. She met Taparia years ago, when a then something Mundhra hired Taparia to help her find a husband.

Mundhra would later be nominated for an Academy Award in the best documentary short subject category for her film, “St. Louis Superman. The story of “Sima Auntie” was one Mundhra wanted to expand on and share.

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